Healing your Shadows through Self-Love
In my readings with my clients, I was often asked to share messages regarding their love lives. I was happily obliged to relay the messages from the Universe, however; I’ve noticed the common theme in the messages for my clients was to love yourself first before you can find love. It does not necessarily mean finding the ‘One.’ It means opening your heart and receiving love. When your heart is open and free, abundant opportunities and love will come to you effortlessly. That’s one major indicator that you’re on a healthy path.
Loving yourself first also means facing your wounds and heal them. It can be scary to many clients of mine but I assured them it was an act of self-love! Facing your wounds can be quite a discomfort but yet liberating at the same time. It is an opportunity for you to heal the parts of you that attract certain partners that were not for your highest good. If you do not heal your wounds, you’ll attract the same patterns over and over again until you heal the parts that attract destructive people and circumstances.
Working on yourself can be disappointing at times because through intense internal work you realize you’ve been attracting the same kind of partners unconsciously. That might come as a shock to you but see the patterns and truth set you free. Your partners might look different or live differently but look closely at the reasons why you were attracted to them in the first place. It was highly likely you also have that same wound within you. I believe the partners are a reflection of you. That’s why doing the internal work help you to break the pattern for good! You’ll also heal your wounds that keep attracts same wounds in other partners.
That’s why it is important not to keep your heart closed because you’ll also attract partners with closed hearts. For instance, if you seem to fall for men who are emotionally unavailable, it also means you are emotionally unavailable! Or in my case, I find myself attracting men who only want to have a sexual relationship with me; I realized I wanted to make them happy. I also gave away my integrity and body in the exchange for attention. I was a giver but I was never a receiver because my heart was closed off. It was easy for me to give and give but it was difficult for me to receive love. Until recently, I finally admitted that I definitely did not love myself!
Needless to say, it took many trials and errors AND heartbreaks before I made a brave decision to finally work on loving myself. Yes, it means going within me and find my shadows. Finding your shadows sounds creepy but it is finding those stubborn ego fears that hinder you from finding a loving and supportive relationship because it sucks having your heartbreak again and again, right?? You deserve happiness and love without questions!
Roll up your sleeves and dive in your heart. Speak with your heart and see what kind of wounds you’re holding on. Do not be afraid to explore with your feelings because only through internal work, you’ll be free from your past and painful past memories.
Liberate yourself from living in the fears and shadows shall open up many doors of opportunities. A very good example that happened to me recently where I’ve shared about a toxic friendship in my blog, ‘Disillusionment in Love’ and I made a final decision to cut off that toxic friend for good. I’ll be honest I feel like a badass woman at the beginning but then, next day I begin questioning my decisions. I went back and forth on it but I knew I couldn’t go back and stay miserable! I knew I have to stick with my decision. It is very uncomfortable to make an empowering decision for myself because loving myself is unfamiliar. It also meant I was alone with my own shadows. I was down for a while because I was facing my shadows and seeing how much I hurt myself from staying in the toxic friendship.
I was about to crawl back into my shadows but then; I was sent a new friend. I was like, “Oh, thank you, Lord! I almost forgot how generous the Universe was.” I express my gratitude for my friend to show up in my path because he is like a ray of hope. It is not a romantic friendship but a loving and supportive friendship that honors me and allows me to use my voice with love. That’s the pure love without strings. It’s like my spirit see your spirit. I was also sent little gifts and compliments as reminders to stay where I am because my internal work and self-love were attracting them!
Soon after, I have an epiphany. Beautiful people and abundant opportunities appear when you open your heart. They also appear to remind you to love yourself and never give up on Love. I am finally receiving Love. You also deserve to receive Love. Love thyself first.
P.S. If you need help with healing your wounds, I have a special reading for you. It is called “Love and Relationship Reading” where I’ll scan your energy via a current photograph of you and receive guidance from the Universe about how can you raise your love vibrations. I’ll also pull cards to gain further insight and guidance for you.