Day 29: I Just Wanted to Be Me

Self-Portrait "Why Am I Feeling this?"

Self-Portrait “Why Am I Feeling this?”

I smiled because I wanted to stay positive. I smiled because it was a natural thing. I smiled because I was an optimist. I smiled because it was me but sometimes its hard to smile. Today I was talking to my Spirit Guide more about this new direction I am on. I found myself feeling sad. My Spirit Guide was showing me signs and things I missed based out of fear and desire. Desire was based on lust, desperate, false hope, and physical wants. I found myself feeling sad when I realized what I was doing was the exactly same thing I have been doing for years. I thought I was going into a different and positive direction but no. I had my Ah-ha! moment last night. The revelation made me sad because it was hurting my growth and I need to accept the new direction they opened up to me.

Before I put my foot down on the new direction, I need to find what’s really making me sad. I was always working on myself and healing myself. I loved to help my clients gain insights into their path. Absolutely there’s no question about that. Sometimes, its tiring to be strong all the time. Sometimes, I just wanted to be me. Giving myself a permission to feel sad. Sometimes I just wanted to be me. Why am I feeling sad? Perhaps I’ve always knew I was in the wrong direction and I did not want to face the reality. Perhaps I was blocking myself the whole time. This new direction was coming for a while to show me that I need to allow myself to feel sad and BE ME.

Mina <3

Sometimes, your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already knows. -unknown

2 Comments on “Day 29: I Just Wanted to Be Me

  1. Thinking of you during these difficult times for you. Any time romance is involved you are going to face problems. Or it sure seems that way. Peace and goodwill

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