Day 11: Working through Changes
I felt self-conscious with my new body today. Ever since I started doing readings, I was under a tremendous stress but it was a good kind of stress. It was necessary to go through this experience and working through it. I often turn to sweet pastries to manage my stress. Needless to say, I gained weight. Another day, I was comparing my body from last year to now. Wow, I was skinny last year but I remembered feeling unhappy and I worked out like crazy. I went on green smoothies diet. I was still unhappy with how my body looked. Few months later, I injured my back. Now that I was looking back, I believed my injury was a blessing in a disguise. The injury forced me to do soul searching and I turned to spirituality books. That’s also when I started doing readings. Ah! Funny how life work.
Today I did not have strange food craving but I ate few cookies out of habit. It does not bring me relief like it used, although, I consciously knew it wouldn’t do me anything good but I continued to eat it. At the same time, I was frustrated with my new body. Pants were getting tight, shirt were not staying in the place, and I felt defeated. I mean I have balanced meals throughout the day. I know it’s okay to have chocolate here and there but it’s the exercise I’ve been neglecting. I walked a bit there and here but its not enough. I used to work out fairly well but since I had my baby, having time to do it was challenging. Ah! I know I know I am making excuses. Finding the motivation to exercise is hard at first but I know I will find it SOON.
Not only that stress is causing me gain weight but a new change is coming to me. Truthfully, I am resisting it a bit. I could feel it’s coming but it was a much needed change. Why? you asked. I hate to admit this but perhaps I didn’t think I could do this. I am not saying it’s impossible but it’s a grand lesson for me. I am unsure how will I proceed the change and/or understand it. Whatever happens, I will still embrace it. I just need to go with the flow. Believe in it and let it go. Yes, yes, I can do this. I came a long way until this point in my life. I prayed for new change. God heard my prayers and will soon answer my prayers. “Keep working. Keep doing whatever you’re doing. It’s working very well in your favor. Keep believing. Don’t give up just yet. The curtain will soon open on its grand opening night. Continue working through changes. Please take care of yourself. Eat good food that feed your soul and body. Exercise well as it will help dispels stress out through your sweat pores. Yoga and meditation are also very important. There is no reason to continue neglecting your body. Re-balance the mind, spirit, and body. Balance is the key.” My Angels reminded me. “Working through changes is a part of lesson.”
Changes are inevitable and not always controllable. What can be controlled is how you manage, react to and work through change process. -Kelly A. Morgan